I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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