I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize
