butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize
