I don't usually arrange sex via text message
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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