Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I need help removing her.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize