i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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