You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
