i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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