Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
And then my night got REAL pukey
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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