508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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