I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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