I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize