bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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