I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
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if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
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Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.