no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
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I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
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Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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