It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize