should my penis look like a turkey
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Randomize
