I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
last night I used snow as a chaser
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