the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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