omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
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