i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
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