whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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