I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize