is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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