clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the knife in your bed.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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