i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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