I need help removing her.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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