You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
