I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Found your dick twin last night
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
