I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
