so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
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Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
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Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap