i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
