That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize