they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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