your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize