let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
