Yo dont text me then not text me
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize