I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize