where am i from again
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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