Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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