return my video game
I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
