Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
