Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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