Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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