Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
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