yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
