dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize