I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
