Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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