I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
